Welcome to the Freak Parade
by A Zombie Daydream
Summary: What can you do when you're own village leader calls you a freak? Well you can join the other freakzoids at Hogwarts! Yes, 6 young ninjas enter the world of magic, thanks to Dumbledore. Whether they listen to him or not is a totally different matter.
1. Introduction to Madness

Hello, Hello, this is my cliché story with the added punch of witty humour (or so i try).

Please share your advice, criticism, and thoughts by reviewing.

The story and plot belong to me, me, me the characters are unfortunately not mine (or perhaps that's a good thing...).

* * *

Welcome to the Freak Parade 

By: Zombie Daydream

_In which the freaks _

_come together, _

_to become one big happy _

_(and scary) family_

* * *

"NARUTO!!!" Naruto shuddered, Sakura sure could scream loud. Tentatively he answered back. 

"Yes?"

"The Hokage wants to see you."

"What does the old hag want now?"

"SHOW SOME RESPECT FOR HER NARUTO!!!"

"Ok! Ok! Geez Sakura you don't have to yell!"

"WHAT WAS THAT?!" Naruto was smart enough to take a hint. He sped off as fast as he could, straight to the Hokage's office.

* * *

When he arrived he made sure to fasten his mask on properly. He knocked then came in. 

"You stupid! You're supposed to knock and then wait for a reply, then you come in!"

"Well sucks to be you cause I'm already in here!" sticking out his tongue all the while, well until he realised no one could see it.

"Anyways your early… I made Sakura get everyone five minutes ago, she sure is taking her time…"

Eventually a small group was assembled around Tsunade's desk. All of them curious as to what the meeting would be about.

"So here's the scoop, an old friend of mine is willing to pay ginormous amounts of cash, if you protect his school."

"He wanted the best the village had to offer, and those that would make an impression." Naruto's face lit up, the old thought he was one of the best. How very honoured he felt!

"But they're all busy right now…" well Naruto had developed a new reason to dislike the Godaime Hokage.

"Soooooo, I'm suggesting you freaks!" The group felt very much assured that they held Tsunade's confidence.

Naruto glanced around the room, Sasuke and Neji were both standing solemnly but under their porcelain masks, he could tell they were scowling.

"You know if you keep your face in that position it'll freeze that way…" proclaimed the Hokage saying exactly what Naruto was thinking. Yes, the freak show was definitely all here except…

"Tsunade? Why is fuzzy brows not here?"

"Well I want them to remember you not be scarred for life!"

"Aaah" amazing, it was Sasuke's first word of the day (and most likely his last).

"Are we the only one that will go on this mission?" inquired Neji bringing the meeting back on track.

"Well I might ask two others to come…I'm also thinking of sending Hinata along, as a medic."

"So who are the other guys?" asked Naruto.

"Well there's Gaara an-"

"WHAT?!?!?!?!" came the unanimous cry.

"Doesn't he have Kazekage duties?"

"Won't he kill the students?"

"What if they drug him and he falls asleep?"

"Well that's you're problem isn't it?" She gave them the classic Cheshire Cat grin, while the guys began plotting her demise.

"Hey wait, who's the other person?" Naruto questioned, always the observant one (not)

"I'm glad you asked! She's a language and culture specialist, so she can answer all your questions about the school and stuff. She's a Jounin so she won't have to hide during battles, and she lives in or near Suna.

"Her name?" asked our raven-haired friend.

"Ummmmm…" they all stared in amazement at her stupidity.

"Sh…Sho...Shio…Siorri? Sierra? Shierra? Shioria? Meh whatever, I'm sure you'll be able to find her."

"How?"

"Her hair I guess, it's kind of weird."

"How so?" Sasuke was getting angry he did not like these hinting games.

"You'll find out!"

Really they we're all losing respect for their oh so powerful Hokage.

"Right so, off you go, hope to see you later, bye."

They we're immediately shooed out of her office.

* * *

"Well we need to head towards Sunagakure as soon as possible. That damn lady didn't even mention any important information! Anyways, meet at the gate in 30 min. Bring everything." As Neji immediately took the leadership role, he began pissing off the other two, very quickly. 

"Who died and made you boss?" Naruto demanded (with Sasuke subtly nodding his approval of the remark).

"I did stupid, so go and pack!" well we all know Neji's boss now!

With many grumbles and mutters Naruto left the building, still sour abut the whole thing. Sasuke being slightly more polite, nodded to Neji and left.

Neji however, sighed and felt very much depressed. He did not like being known as a freak. It was bad enough when people saw veins popping out of his forehead and then started to run down the street screaming bloody mary. He always tried not to think to much of it, but when people ended up in the insane asylum he did feel guilty. Well kind of guilty, more like a tiny smidgen. He was also worried about Hinata, her fragile mind would most likely not be able to withstand such stress of being called a freak!

* * *

Author Person: And so it begins... 


	2. Take the Plunge

Welcome to the Freak Parade

Chapter 2

* * *

Soon the whole group were at the gate with everything packed. They exchanged a couple pleasantries, and set off in the general direction of Sunagakure.

Naruto, who was not the sharpest crayon in the box, questioned Neji (who had self-proclaimed himself as leader).

"Do you know where we're going?"

"No."

"Say what?!" Naruto was thoroughly confused.

"If I knew where Suna was, than it wouldn't be much of a hidden village would it?"

"… I guess?"

"Exactly so shut up and follow me." And he did just that.

* * *

Sasuke noticed that the trees were thinning out into a kind of rocky wasteland, and then a sea of sand. The group decided to have a break, not because they were tired (of course not!) but they wanted to look sharp and put together as representatives of Konohagakure (right…). Naruto gave them all a tour of their surroundings however there was only one person listening (blushing all the while).

"And now, to your left, right, and centre, the mother-fucker of all deserts, SUNAGAKURE!!!"

"My, my, don't let the elders hear that kind of language Naruto or you'll get a heck of a flogging." Came a sly, mysterious voice from the sky.

"Gah! Who's there?!"

And now we interrupt this story to take a look at each of our characters!

Naruto was frantically looking around for the voice.

Hinata slid into a halfhearted battle position to make Naruto feel better.

Sasuke and Neji sat calmly in their spots because they had already known about the unknown visitor and were not threatened at all.

Lastly, the unknown visitor was trying to hold in their laughter at Naruto's stupidity.

Back to the story!

After a whole lot of hustle and bustle, they all mounted on a HUGE paper fan belonging to Temari. Now you must have realized that this group was a little bit awkward because none of them really knew each other that well but of course that didn't bother Naruto at all.

"How did you know we were here?" he questioned.

"Well, for his last birthday I got Gaara this fancy-pancy crystal ball!" you could actually see the worship me signs on her forehead…

"OOH was it like the Sandaime Hokage's?"

"Um ok?" then came an awful awkward silence (gay baby was born) "Anyways we're almost there, in a few more minutes you'll be entertained by the Godaime Kazekage himself"

"Really?'

"No."

"?"

* * *

(And now having an embarrassing moment, Sasuke Uchiha!) Sasuke was slightly worried (I mean anxious because Uchiha's don't get worried) that at any moment he could fall to his death from a stupid giant paper fan. OH the humiliation! Even if he died he'd still hear Naruto's mocking laughter, laughing, laughing. Well, he thought if I go, he comes with me, and then he smirked evilly.

They walked into the Kazekage's office and met the Kazekage himself and that random person Tsunade told them about.

"Hey girl! Are you certified for this job?" demanded Naruto. She just glared at him, I hate him already, she thought. Gaara sighed and replied for her.

"She is a jounin so yes she probably is certified, she's also the same age as you, her name is Shiori" Gaara then receded into his bubble of gloom and death. Sasuke looked at her hair, Tsunade had said that it was strange, but it wasn't. To tell you the truth it was pretty normal, but then again all their hairstyles we're screwed up so how could they judge (I mean bowl cuts are so passé!). It was a dark sea blue that was in a braid to her mid back, how exciting… Silver green eyes surveyed her peers, and to tell you the truth she wasn't really impressed yet. Well anyways, she thought I have to deal with them for a year, might as well be nice or whatever that means.

* * *

Naruto Uzumaki, a spiky haired blond with an obsession with orange if the orange ANBU uniform told her anything (how'd he get that done?). He was also known as Toad… who the heck wanted to be called Toad?

Sasuke Uchiha, raven haired guy with a revenge complex and attitude problems, well she'd heard of him. He was Snake, it was a cooler name than Toad…

Neji Hyuuga, scary guy with family revenge issues greeeeeaaaaat, lucky for her they'd already been resolved but he was still scary…(it's the eyes, always the eyes) Neji was the Raven, that's also better than Toad!

Hinata Hyuuga, cousin to Neji and adorable! (Although she had the eyes she was way too cute to use them daily like her cousin) Well at least that meant another girl on the team Shiori thought to herself. She was called Mouse, which also beat Toad I mean who wants to be named after a creature that gives you warts?

Gaara (of the desert), did he even have a last name? Anyways she already knew him so it wasn't a big deal.

Shiori sighed, how would this 'lovely' experience turn out? Would she be driven insane or would the mission be completed first? Only time would tell (dramatic music)

* * *

Hinata was also glad another girl was on the team. Of course she didn't mind staying with Naruto forever and ever but it was nice to be with another girl too. Hinata wondered to herself what this Shiori might be like. She wore charcoal pants and a leafy green shirt, very plain (pretty boring really) and she tied her headband around her neck. Well, she looked nice enough, but you never know what kind of people they turn out to be.

"Um, should we get going?" Hinata asked timidly

"Right! Well in wizarding culture, it is very common and easy to travel by fire." Replied their consultant (so to speak).

The group was pretty much shocked into silence (which was especially odd since Naruto was around), in fact you could practically hear crickets chirping. That was especially annoying to Gaara, because he told Kankuro to get rid of the infestation.

Shiori sighed and then said

"Here take this and throw it into the fire." She gestured for Sasuke to toss it in.

Sasuke snatched a bit of the green powder and threw it in the fire, hoping no adverse side effects affected him (well it could change Naruto but not Sasuke).

The fire turned green and rose up higher much to the displeasure of many in that room. Shiori told all of them, to firmly grasp their belongings.

"Now step in and say Leaky Cauldron!"

When everyone had gone through the floo network, she checked to see if anyone had left something behind. With everything all clear, she hopped in herself.

Now, being Kage meant someone who must have had a lot of power. People with that kind of power don't like being spun around watching a series of fireplaces rushing by. Being spat out of one was even worse. He calmly tried to dust all the soot off, but unfortunately for him the dust resembled his sand. Poor, poor, Gaara.

* * *

Shiori hopped out of the fireplace she was met with a group of accusing faces.

"You should have warned us!"

"Where's the fun in that?"

There were still many heated glares focused on her. She laughed nervously and excused herself over to the bar.

"Excuse me sir," she asked in English "but I would like to have lodging for 6 please and thank you."

"Of course, would you like 3 rooms of 2?"

"That's fine."

The rest of the group could only stare at Shiori conversing with the bartender/innkeeper.

"Okay, this is how it's going to work. Hinata and I will be taking a room, and you guys can figure out your arrangements but don't you dare kill each other!" She said addressing the group. "Come down after you've unpacked, and don't draw attention to yourself" she stared at Naruto who was quite bewildered.

It was also Naruto who suggested rock paper scissors as a means to decide lodging.

Surprisingly they used the idea, because they didn't want to think of another (or perhaps they had thought up that idea as well?)

Shiori decided to step out for a moment, she really didn't feel like explaining everything to her comrades. She looked around Diagon Alley and spotted the very grandiose white building freshly cleaned by the goblins financed by the Ministry of Magic (not that they had any choice mind you).


End file.
